We all know our kids are growing up in a super digital world compared to that of what we did. My ‘digital’ went as far as the Commodore-64 and Merlin (remember Merlin?). In no way, shape, or form did our digital worlds mean connecting with people across the world or even next door for that matter. People who say the world really isn’t any different today, are not thinking about the digital aspect, an aspect which is huge!
A recent study by McAfee basically revealed that tweens and teens while online are not thinking the way they should be. Just take a look at these stats:
955 American teens (593 ages 13-15 & 362 ages 16-17) were part of the study.
- 69 percent of teens divulged their physical location
- 28 percent chatted with strangers
Of those teens who chatted with strangers (defined as people whom they did not know in the real world):
- 43 percent shared their first name
- 24 percent shared their email address
- 18 percent post pictures of themselves
- 12 percent shared their cell phone number
Also, even worse…girls tend to make put themselves out there more often than boys: 32% of the girls said they chat with strangers online compared to 24% of boys
Of course we don’t want to live in a ‘fraidy cat’ world. You know the whole ‘hyperparenting’ thing. But, this is really scary. I don’t think kids get it. I think they are growing up in a world where social networking is so acceptable, that some of them just don’t think twice. But, okay….where are the parents? Are the parents clueless? Are they there? Do you think maybe the parents just don’t realize the dangers themselves? Maybe they have no idea what is available out there. The problem is most kids know way more than their parents these days when it comes to the whole digital world.
My 11-year-old daughter took it upon herself to start a Twitter account one day. I have told her over and over about not divulging your personal information. She thought she was doing the right thing when she started to tweet with a different name and some girl’s picture that she found online (yup). Well, this picture was of this pretty young girl (of course, think like an 11 year old, think Miley Cyrus-look). A couple of days later she nonchalantly and innocently started talking about this. What? Twitter! I immediately checked it out. She had grown men twittering to her about wanting to meet her. (gives me the chills thinking about it). She did not tweet back. She basically had no clue on how Twitter even worked. All she was on there for was to tweet to Miley Cyrus (and did lots of that). Needless to say her Twitter account was canceled that night and a long and candid discussion was given.
Statistics show there are as many as half a million registered sex offenders in the United States alone. Sure, lots of these people are not out there to do anything wrong, but many of them are out there to prey on the young and naive. Looking at these statistics, this is a scary thought.
What do you think? Are parents naive? Are kids clueless?
{ 21 comments }
Some parents are so naive that they encourage it. My daughter is 9 and so many of her friends have facebook accounts set up by their parents so they can play farmville. Aren’t there enough young-child geared games online, like poptropica, without throwing your kid into facebook land? And you have to lie about their age to do it!
I think kids just take it for granted that it’s not a big deal. It scares me. By the time this is an issue for my kids, I’m really scared of how commonplace this will all be.
As for me- foursquare freaks me out b/c I don’t like announcing my location to the world.
We’re going to have to teach online stranger danger just as much as the real life kind. It’s different but we can still keep our kids safe with candid talks just like the one you wrote about.
.-= Joey @ Big Teeth & Clouds´s last blog ..So do you want it =-.
I’m a big believer in parental controls on the computer, tv, or cell phone. It’s very easy to block access to anything I think my kids may not be ready for yet. And conversations BEFORE they get access goes a long way to heading off trouble.
We can’t protect our kids from everything, but we can teach them about the real world and try to teach them the same life skills that we’ve learned, so they can protect themselves.
.-= J.´s last blog ..Eastern Conference Champions at The Grove =-.
The problem is that kids aren’t always on the computers that parents put the controls on. As they get older they tend to use computers at friend’s houses or other places where the controls may not be. I do believe in controls but I do think education is more important so they know what to do when faced with these things.
If nothing else, I think statistics like these “tell” parents that now part of their parental job is to also stay up to date on technology because they need to know at LEAST as much as their kids in order to keep up.
I do think that some parents are naive. I have 17, 14, 12, and 9-yr. old kids and I’m all over what they are doing online and/or on their cell phones. I’m probably overly suspicious but you can never be too safe as far as I’m concerned.
.-= Kari´s last blog ..Share Some Stuff Saturday =-.
Wow, that is scary! I think it’s a mix – and that kids think they can handle themselves. I worry too about all the growing up kids do online – I’m glad there’s not a record of my high school self on the internet.
.-= Unplanned Cooking´s last blog ..Sisters on a road trip =-.
It’s a combination of parental cluelessness and kids just not getting it. Here we are, responsible adults, chatting with each other (grin) and how hard would it be to track down some of us, based on info. we’ve posted on our blogs, or about ourselves here in our responses? Probably not too difficult, except the majority of us don’t care enough (or have the time!) to do the kind of searching it would take to find out all the pertinent details.
Unfortunately, there are creeps out there who do take the time to find out. I think I’d break my daughter’s fingers if she opened a Twitter or Facebook account on her own. I’m still battling (slowly) over the Facebook thing – I know 4th and 5th grade girls who have accounts there (they want to friend me. NO WAY!) even though FB says children must be 13 years old, minimum, to have an account.
My sister suggests a site called “edmoto” which she says is like Facebook only for the younger crowd. I haven’t visited it yet myself, but if it looks decent enough – it might be an option until your child is old enough/mature enough to have an account elsewhere.
If parents didn’t do the social networking, do you think this sort of thing would be such a big deal? My husband and I have cell phones, but don’t text, or constantly check email/surf the net, etc. (they’re very very very basic cell phones – no camera, etc.). I think this is one reason why my kids haven’t gotten too caught up in digital stuff yet – because mom & dad aren’t (except for me, on blogging & facebook!) . Would my own kid care so much about Facebook if I wasn’t on it? Not sure – but she wants a page because some of her friends have one.
.-= Kathy´s last blog ..Oh just put some clothes on- =-.
It is scary these days. I think kids are actually pretty clueless, they don’t think about things like predators and strangers trying to take advantage of them. They think it’s fun and unfortunately, thinking they are anonymous, they share much more than they would otherwise. We have to be especially vigilant these days about what our kids are doing on the internet…I think they just don’t get it. We have to constantly remind and monitor them. BTW…I completely remember my commodore 64! Iloved it!
.-= Melissa (Confessions of a Dr.Mom)´s last blog ..Lessons From The Yogurt Lady =-.
I think that our society is in an expansion phase with technology and as of yet, we have not determined how to control it. It is very scary that kids can connect with sexual predators so easily online and even if parents are very vigilant, there are still many ways to get around this. Esp. as kids get older and have more physical freedoms. (Not that they are trying to connect with perverts, they just don’t understand all the dangers yet.)
When I think about myself as a tween and young teen, I was so clueless. I would have done anything to get some attention from the in-crowd. I really hope that I can teach my children enough that when they reach the age where they could be getting into things online that are not appropriate, that they will use discretion, and talk to me if they are confused about what to do. But I know that sounds really naive. It’s just so hard to imagine it for me now when they are still pooping on themselves and chewing on their toys.
Are parents naive? Yes
Are kids clueless? Yes
Bad combo! I have also seen many of my friends allowing their younger than 13yr olds get FB accounts.. for me.. lesson number 1 they’re teaching is it’s cool to lie to get what you want – cuz you’re supposed to be at least 13 to open an acct there. There is a lot of stuff said by adults that they befriend on there that I wouldn’t want my children reading!
I think it’s just extremely hard for parents to give their kids things like iPhones and such, and then expect to be able to keep tabs on what they’re doing as far as social networking. My poor kids.. I told them that they’ll be able to have cell phones when they get jobs and pay for them on their own…
Yes, parents are naive. Even worse, I think parents have this over-inflated idea of how mature their kids are. They are kids – they will all do childish, irresponsible things. I think we have to watch over them closely – especially with the internet.
.-= debbie´s last blog ..Guilty Pleasure =-.
I definitely think kids are clueless!
I subscribed to my daughter’s tweets and friended her on Facebook. I knew when an “18yr old” was chatting it up (she was 14 at the time). I sent him a friendly little message about the police finding out and him being listed as a sex offender, because I WOULD make something up. I’m crazy like that. Needless to say, he hit the road. I give her the freedom to learn, but I step in when I need to.
Man, times have changed! What happened to the days of sneaking out the window and joy riding in Dad’s car at 13? Kids have it so different….
.-= Angelia Sims´s last blog ..A Puppy Named Brownie =-.
It’s a scary world and your other posters have said, kids are clueless. Great post! I just gave you a few awards on my site. Hope you have a great day!
.-= TV’s Take´s last blog ..Being Grateful =-.
Wow, that story about your daughter is scary!
We’ve had lots of talks with our sons on this subject. Our almost-16 year old is ultra-conservative, so I don’t worry too much about him. Our 12-year old is more of a risk-taker. But besides our talks, both boys took mandatory internet safety courses at school, and my younger son is always quoting from that and telling me he has an internet safety certificate! When they each signed up for Facebook, I made it a requirement that they friend me, just so I can keep an eye on what they’re posting.
On the other hand, I’m not setting a very good example for them! Because I’m a professional writer, I use my full name on everything online, including my blogs. And twice now, I’ve taken my whole family with me to meet people I met online! My son was just admonishing me about that last week when we were on vacation and meeting another online friend for the first time. But I explained how thoroughly I checked things out – it’s a different situation since both boys and I have a chronic illness that I blog about, so the people we’ve met are other ill people – including another teen – who share the same illness. I reassured the boys that in both cases, we e-mailed extensively before meeting. And who’s going to pose as a sick person?? Anyway, the irony of the situation struck me last week, so it’s funny you wrote about it now.
Do as I say, not as I do!
Sue
I believe the stat. I’m always monitoring my daughter and telling her to watch what she says. They get so caught up in the “whats on your mind” and tell it all.
This is so very scary. This is exactly why my 10 yr old is not allowed on the computer. Thanks for the reminder.
Also, thanks for stopping by my place this weekend. I really appreciate the comment love!
I don’t think children understand the “big picture” – they don’t ever think it can (or will) happen to them. Not to mention, most teenagers think they’re grown and can take care of themselves…
I’m not letting my daughter have any social accounts until she’s 13 and I’m going to be her friend and have her passwords on all of them! Bravo to you for taking control over her Twitter account (even if it was all about Miley).
.-= Momma Drama´s last blog ..Hubby’s Autobiography =-.
Very good point and frightening to think about. I am your newest follower. if you have a chance, check out my blog at http://mformommy.blogspot.com
I look forward to reading more.
.-= HRH Mommy´s last blog ..25 Day Challenge – Day 22 =-.
Scary stats…my 3rd grader has been begging me for a year for FB. Of course no…I was just surprised it started so early.
.-= Dawn´s last blog ..Angel Innocence =-.